One Night Only Specials -- Cena's Second Greatest Test

Well guys, I've decided to continue the legacy of the One Night Only edition of which we saw our favorite superstar taking on a paper bag in a very technical matchup, which the paper bag just nicked out the win. Who am I kidding? John Cena can't wrestle for shit. If you want to see that match, you can see it here.

Before I go on with the match, I'll introduce you to John Cena's opponent, the ferocious, the angry, the Grizzly Bear. Thanks to wikipedia, I got some information on the Grizzly Bear. Weighing in at 500 pounds, he hails from Ontario, Canada. The Grizzly Bear has had only one tenure in wrestling, he was in UFC under the name of "Carlos Newton".

Yes, John Cena will face a Grizzly Bear. What's better than to watch Cena get demolished by an angry grizzly bear?

The Grizzly Bear's music hits, and he enters the match with everybody who is literate, can walk and around the age of 14-45(With some exceptions, *Cough* ahem...) cheering. The champ then makes his entrance, welcomed by the fat horny chicks, and the spoiled five year olds who have replica spinner belts, Cena t-shirts, action figures and tons of other Cena merchandise that has kept him in his job. Cena takes his shirt off, and throws it to the smart marks section, which is burned/used as an alternative to tissue. As soon as Vinnie Mac finds out about this, the camera men are ordered to cut off that scene, and instead, film Cena throwing another shirt, this time into the other section, where we see the fat horny chicks wrestling five year olds for the shirt.

The bell rings, and the match starts. The Grizzly Bear starts the offensive(as always) and completely destroys Cena. This continues for twenty more minutes. The Grizzly Bear goes for his finisher, the Mauler(powerbomb). As Cena is in the air, he ducks behind the Grizzly Bear, and clotheslines him, sending the Grizzly Bear to the ground. Cena goes on the top rope, and attempts to hit the legdrop. However, the Grizzly Bear quickly wakes up, and delivers a superplex to Cena. The Grizzly Bear goes for the pin...1....2....Cena, who looked like he had died seconds ago, just wakes up on the last second(Seriously, SELL your injuries).

The Grizzly Bear goes for a couple of body blows, but Cena reverses it into the "superman clothesline" that sends them to the outside and bringing attention to the horny chicks and five year olds who all stand up and cheer. The Grizzly Bear gets into the ring before Cena and starts taunting. Cena, who looks like as if he got shot, crawls his way into the ring at the count of 8. The Grizzly Bear, on the turnbuckle, is about to deliver a body splash on Cena. The Grizzly Bear hits it, but Cena ducks out of the way. Cena now in feverish fever, runs and delivers a clothesline on the Grizzly Bear. He goes on the turnbuckle and hits the legdrop. He then does that five-knuckle shuffle move. He goes for the STF and hits it. However, the Grizzly Bear manages to reverse the move. The Grizzly Bear hits Cena with a couple of hard punches. He goes for the Mauler and gets it. Cena, yet again attempts to look like he's knocked out, breaks the pin at 2.

Cena wakes up, does his "three moves of doom" and goes for the FU. He lifts him up as if the bear is a five-hundred ton warship and delivers the FU. The Bear, however, does not follow the script that Vinnie Mac gave to him earlier, and kicks out of the pin. The Bear then gets real frustrated and decides to cut the crap. He starts attacking Cena and completely destroys him. The high point is when Cena starts bleeding and the horny chicks and five year olds start crying. This angers Vinnie Mac and tells the officials to find out a way to stop the match or else their merch sales would take a hit. Their first solution is, to get interference on behalf of the bear. Enter Hornswoggle, who comes out of the his home, the ring, and attacks Cena. Hornswoggle delivers a punch with his pea sized hands, and Cena pretends as if a cannon shot him. The ref calls for the bell and Cena is declared the winner.

This just proves that Cena doesn't know how to wrestle and relies on scripts to win. Seriously, as Nic said, GTFO(Note to self: Future Cena finisher name) of wrestling.

Vafa

End of the year soon...

Perhaps we should do an end of year awards ceremony. WWE has the Slammy's, so why not our own version? So, on to the categories:

The Worst:

The Gobbledegooker Award -- Awarded for the worst gimmick of 2009
The Katie Vick Award -- Worst storyline of 2009
The Shockmaster Award -- Botch of the year
The FU Award -- Worst finisher

The Best:

Hogan vs. Andre Award -- Match of the Year
Undertaker Award -- Superstar of the year
Trish Stratus Award -- Diva of the year
Hart Foundation Award -- Tag team of the year
Tombstone Award -- Best Finisher

Nominees to follow.

Survivor Series review (part 2)

Here's part two of the Survivor Series. I must warn you though, this next part contains many disappointments. So, without a further a do...

Let's continue with one more traditional Survivor Series match, Team James vs. Team McCool. *Yawn*, to say the truth, I didn't even watch the match, I was playing my Nintendo DS instead and was listening to AIC's Black Gives Way To Blue(Which is amazing, btw). So, I just pop on wwe.com and read the article about the match. But anyways, that should be insignificant, as I'm not here to describe the match, I'm here to say what that match has achieved. So anyways, the matchup starts off as resident prostitute, Kelly Kelly, eliminating Layla. Wut...? Layla being the first superstar eliminated is terrible for her heel status, not to mention that Kelly Kelly eliminated her. Then, Michelle McCool eliminates Gail Kim!? Just unbelievable, Gail Kim, possibly the most talented diva the WWE has at the moment, getting eliminating second? Well, this PPV sure has downgraded some top superstars...*Cough* Orton *Cough*. After that, a fine showing by Beth Pheonix, as she eliminates two more divas. However, her fine run is disrupted by James, who eliminates Pheonix and then Alicia. Melina defeats captain McCool in a decent finish.

Benefits and Negatives

+ Michelle McCool heel status
+ Melina face status
+ Mickie James face status
Neutral showing by Pheonix
Gave up chance of a new diva push
- Gail Kim face status
- Layla heel status

Potential Storylines Generated

James teams up with Melina
James and Melina vs. McCool, Layla and Pheonix
I can't really think of anything else

Next up, the WHC match, in which the unified tag team champions took on Undertaker in a triple threat(no, not handicap) match. Jericho and Show started off by attacking the Undertaker, then Jericho locking Taker in the Walls of Jericho. Show then attacked Jericho to make it a three-way dance. Taker then locked in the Hell's Gate on Big Show, and won the match. Ugh, talk about generic. So, what has this match possibly done? What, to show that the Undertaker is an unstoppable force and will not lose even if the odds are piled up against him? Yeah, we learned that years ago.

Benefits and Negatives

+ Undertaker face status
- Jerishow's tag team status
Yet some more predictable crap shoved down our throats

Potential Storylines Generated

Jerishow vs. Brothers of Destruction
Jericho vs. Undertaker
Big Show vs. Undertaker

Now, the moment you've been waiting for! Our favorite superstar taking on DX! The match starts off with HBK superkicking Triple H. Then it's a three-way dance. Then Cena makes Triple H tap out. BORING. God, the WWE are so damn predictable nowadays, and besides, if they are going to use recycled ideas, at least use some that weren't on the same PPV(Read the above passage). It's the exactly same idea, a wrestler betrays his partner, then they start fighting until the defending champion makes one of them tap.

Benefits and Negatives

+ Cena face status(I don't know if that's a benefit or a negative...)
- DX tag team status(Read the above)
Cena being shoved down our throats for a long, long while

Potential Storylines Generated

Cena vs. all of WWE's past, present and future wrestlers(Winner: Cena)

Anyways, hope all of you have enjoyed my review.

Until then,

Vafa

Nic's end of November/Start of December plans

Okay, I figure I'm going to update you all on my plans for the month to come, and I'll do this in the last week or 2 of very month.

First off, I'm going to finish the Shane-O storyline I started a while ago. I'll do what will probably be my most in-depth post ever (more on that later), and start a new storyline. I'll do a storyline post every month, and fill the gaps with other ramblings.

I'll keep you posted.

Nic

Survivor Series review (Part 1)

Sorry for the real long wait, I had final examinations which stopped me from writing.

So, one of the big four and personally one of my favorite PPVs of the year, Survivor Series came around. To my major disappointment, most of the matches were terrible, boring and predictable. Here's why...

First, let's start off with the traditional Survivor Series match which team Orton faced team Kingston. It started off well, with Orton eliminating Henry and Punk eliminating R-Truth in a fine opening. After a number of eliminations, Christian and Kingston took on Punk and Orton. Then, Kingston's possibly last chance of winning went out the window, when Christian got eliminated. Or did it? Kingston amazingly managed to pin CM Punk, after a very back and forth match. Now, I'm sure you are thinking this...Orton + fatigued wrestler = Dead meat. But no, Kingston almost immediately hits the Trouble on Paradise on Orton, and wins the match. This is completely degrading to Punk and especially Orton. Randy Orton, who is a multi-time world champion, the youngest world champion, Royal Rumble winner and countless other accomplishements to his name, to lose in a measly six seconds to a well, not "top class" finisher. What I mean by "top class" is that the other finishers that were worthy of making Orton laying on the mat for three seconds, such as the GTS, Walls of Jericho, Chokeslam, Tombstone, and the Codebreaker, for only a few. However, since the WWE took that risk at the expense of Orton and Punk, they better back it up by giving Kofi a push. If they don't, it'll be a complete waste of degrading Punk and Orton. Come on, pinning two former World champions in a few seconds is no easy feat. So WWE, don't waste this chance.

Benefits and Negatives

+ Kofi's face status
+ credibility of Trouble in Paradise
Possible new face in the main event(Finally!).
- Orton's heel status
- Punk's heel status
Possible temporary/permanent removal of Orton and Punk from the main event, just like Rey Mysterio(Nooo!)

Potential Storylines Generated

Punk vs. R-Truth
Kofi vs. Orton
Kofi vs. Cena
Kofi vs. Sheamus(If he wins at TLC, which is unlikely)
Kofi's shot for the WWE championship

Next up, Batista versus Rey. It was an okay match. Back and forth until Batista's reversal, then downhill for Mysterio from there. Batista then pounded Rey, until the official stopped the match. Well, only thing I can say is, I hope that they turn Batista into a big, badass heel, because main-event heels are desperately needed in the WWE.

Benefits and Negatives
+ Batista heel status
- Rey face status
A possible new, vicious heel in the making.

Possible Storylines Generated

Batista vs. Rey Mysterio
Batista vs. Undertaker
Batista teaming up with a heel, such as CM Punk or even Drew McIntyre

Then next is another traditional Survivor Series match in which Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Sheamus, Dolph Ziggler and the US champ and captain of the team, The Miz taking on Matt Hardy, Finlay, Evan Bourne, Shelton Benjamin and IC champ and captain, John Morrison. This match is a perfect example of arrogant, ambitious heels versus athletic, electrifying faces. The match goes off with Bourne eliminating Ziggler, and McIntyre eliminating Bourne. Then, an interesting showdown of the Irishmen Sheamus and Finlay with Sheamus winning it eventually(Yes!). Then, after a number of pins, captain Morrison faces not one, not two, but THREE superstars all on his own. And not just any superstars, The Miz, Sheamus and Drew McIntyre. Morrison showcases his terrific high-flying ability and has some offence, but the trio prove too strong for him. Sheamus eventually pins him, and hopefully, it'll bring either three of them to the main event level. Suprisingly, Sheamus is the number one contender for the WWE Championship at TLC facing derpity-dip-shit, John Cena. The unfortunate truth is that we all know that Sheamus will not win. But all in all, this match was probably the best of the PPV. WWE, watch out for the reign of Miz-ery.

Benefits and Negatives

+ The Miz heel status
+ Drew McIntyre heel status
+ Sheamus heel status
Possible new talent into the main event
At the moment, I can't find any negatives really

Potential Storylines Generated

Drew McIntyre, The Miz or Sheamus shot for world championship gold
The Miz and Sheamus team up to make an explosive tag team
McIntyre vs. Morisson
McIntyre vs. Undertaker(But this seems unlikely)
Sheamus vs. John Cena
Sheamus and The Miz vs. DX(If they team up)
The Miz vs. John Cena

I'm signing off now, check out for part 2.

Vafa

How TNA can become real competition

A while ago, I talked about what WWE could do to improve it's product. We all know that there's very little chance of that happening. But, what I do see happening is TNA, the little company that could, becoming a real threat to WWE.

Let's face it, WWE was at it's peak during the Monday Night Wars. We need that excitement back. The only way to get it back is to have a rival company make it to the same stage as WWE. The closest company to achieving this is TNA. So let's take a look at the steps TNA needs to take in order to compete with WWE.

First of all, stop hiring WWE rejects and washed up talent from bygone decades. Sure, there were a couple that still had some career and enough of a name left to use, but the rest are garbage. To go along with this, bring in some young talent to replace them.

Find some new guys by maybe partnering with a federation like ROH or something. Keep pushing the fresh faces they already have. Don't let them go to waste

Next up, move to either Monday or Friday nights. Don't go head to head with WWE's "D" show. So what you can outdraw Superstars? Nobody cares about that crappy show. You want to get noticed? Outdraw SD or Raw. Besides, that shouldn't be too hard, based on WWE's current crop of crap.

Fire Russo. Nuff said.

I like that Jarrett is gone, but I'm kinda leery on the Hulkster being in charge. It may be good, it may be bad. I'm just going to see where it goes and pass judgement after it pans out a bit more.

Start advertising outside of Spike. I have yet to see a TNA commercial that wasn't on Spike. Seriously, you can't get your name out there if you don't try to get your name out there. This is probably a financial issue, but if TNA fires all the old talent that's useless, then sign new guys to entry level spots, that could free up some cash.

Plus if they advertise more, people will start watching, and buying PPV's and merch. Plus advertisers may come to TNA to put their name on stuff. Get sponsors;.

TNA should also start booking larger arenas. I say this because you can't reach a lot of people if you tape in some little lot in Universal Studios. Take the show on the road, and book sligthly larger venues to start, then work up to larger ones. This shouldn't be done however, until it's clear that the arenas would get good sales.

In closing, TNA needs to watch WWE carefully, and do the complete opposite of what they're doing. It's clearly not working for them, why would it work for TNA?

I'll be back some time again with the finish to Shane-O's retirement.

Peace out, y'all

Nic

What the WWE should avoid doing to look less fake.

Firstly, I'm deducing that you people are tired of the 24/7 fantasy storylines, and since we're the ACA Creative Team, this topic should help out the WWE Creative Team/superstars to look way less fake/scripted. So, let's get started...


I was at home, watching Raw with my sister(who barely watches wrestling btw). She thought Raw was real crap, and I don't blame her. After watching Raw, she instantly found out that WWE was scripted. So, what should the WWE be doing to avoid future incidents like this?

Firstly, it's that the wrestlers deliberately puts themselves in the position of their opponents finishers. For example, if I wanted to go for an missile dropkick(Jumping dropkick from the turnbuckle) my opponent would be standing in a forward position, facing me. If I wanted to go for a bulldog from the top rope instead, my opponent would also be in a standing position, but facing the opposite way. This has been apparent, and seems that the wrestlers want to be fed a finisher.

How to fix this problem? It's real simple, just not put yourself in that position. If a wrestler's main finisher is in a position that a wrestler finds himself rarily in, for example if somebody's main finisher was a jumping legdrop and the position the opponent should be in is standing up, and his head facing down, then that finisher should be either turned into a signature move, or completely abolished. The process of turning it into a signature move is simple. Signature moves are used as "warm-ups" to finishers, therefore, whenever that rare situation happens, the wrestler can hit that move. It's real simple.

Hmm, has anybody heard that the Wrestlemania ring canvas is made out of pillow feathers? Well, that would explain why Undertaker was fed a hundred finishers by HBK and Undertaker delivering a thousand tombstones, until the 1001th tombstone managed to get the win at WM25. If you did not get my point, I was refering to the sudden surge of energy that is given to the wrestlers at PPVs. I mean, come on, what difference does a match at Raw and a match at a PPV have? None, and it's just stupid to see a match at Raw taking five minutes, but a match at the PPV taking thirty.

But hey, even though this is a problem and makes WWE look a bit fake, PPVs are a major way of making cash. Also, it just wouldn't seem right to see a Raw match surpass, say, a Survivor Series match. Besides, a PPV has more airtime than a normal show. So, if you want, we could just ignore the last paragraph.

Is it just me, or does some wrestlers let opponents out of their pinfall attempts?
Even though this is less apparent than the other things mentioned here, it is still important. When a wrestler simply forgets that he HAS to win and his opponent doesn't, his opponent bails him out at the last moment. Take an example, if Ziggler goes for a pinfall on Cena and since Ziggler probably demolished Cena, Cena is unable to counter the pinfall. Ziggler suddenly remembers that if he pins Cena, Vince McMahon will draft him to some brand as a "push" and leaves him there, fighting jobbers, just like Shelton Benjamin. Ziggler suddenly avoids this scenario and deliberately lets Cena out of the pin. Okay, this may be exaggerated, but I think you know what I mean.

And sometimes, if both the wrestlers forget which wrestler should win(Although this is not the case all the time...) the referee intervenes with the result of the match by having an extra count or goes slower than normal until the wrestler realises that. Haven't you noticed that the referee goes for a four count at least once?

Speaking of referees...haven't you noticed that instead of a five count for a DQ, the referee does a three count instead? Something even more common, haven't you noticed two counts for a pinfall ends up being the winning pinfall? I have noticed that a lot myself, when I just hear two taps and the next thing I know, the wrestler's hand is raised.

Last but surely not least, firing Cena would help the WWE look less fake. Duh...

I'm sure there are way more reasons that I have not mentioned here and that some of these things I have mentioned have not been noticed by you, but all in all, it should be enough for a good read.

Until then,

Vafa

Fantasy Storylines -- Shane Resigns? Part 1

Here we go with a new storyline. Vafa's been riding my ass (no jokes please) to post more, so I'm trying to find a balance between quality and quantity. Hopefully neither one suffers.

Week 1:

The news of Shane's resignation becomes public. Everyone speculates that he's off to help his mom with her campaign (which will fail, just sayin'). There is no other news than that at this time.

Week 2:

It is announced that Shane will have a going away party next week live on Raw. Every superstar will be there, and so will the rest of the McMahon family.

Week 3:

It's time. Shane-O's leaving the WWE. The ring has a podium set up in the middle, and there's a table with a cake shaped like a dollar sign on it. The superstars file out to ringside, followed by the McMahons.

Everyone is enjoying the party, and ask Shane to say a few words.

Shane: "Ladies and gentlemen, I've been with the WWE for nearly my entire life. I've enjoyed every moment of it. But now, it's time for me to move on. But before I do, I want to dispel any rumours about why I'm stepping down from my position. I am not, as some have suggested, leaving to work on my mother's campaign for senate.

I'm stepping down because I wish to invoke section 3 of the contract I made with my father. When I signed on to WWE several years ago, I signed a contract. Section 3 of that contract would allow me to take over the reigns when I felt that my father was no longer capable of running the company.

Given the current state of affairs, the stagnant title pictures, the guest host crap, I'd say that you've really dropped the ball, Dad. I'm invoking section 3 effective immediately. Dad, you must pack up your office and leave at once. I am the new chairman of--"

Stefanie wrestles the mic out of his hands.

Stef: "Hold on. We agreed that when Dad lost his marbles that I would be the one to take over. Besides, I control his power of attorney. Should Dad become unable to make decisions for himself, which he clearly can't, I get to make said decisions for him. I decide that you are NOT the new chairman, you are NOT the--"

Now Vince grabs the mic.

Vinnie: "Shut up, both of you. Just shut up! I may not be the man I was 20 years ago, but I'm still able to run my own company, dammit! Now both of you listen to me, and listen good: if you'd read further into that contract, you'd see that I have the power to overturn it as I see fit. Right now, I see fit. As for my power of attorney, I hereby revoke it from you, Stefanie.

I'm not leting either one of you take over until I see proof that you can actually run a decent show. Starting next week, the competition is on to see who can be the better GM."

With that, Vince storms off back to his office. Shane and Stef just look at eachother with angry expressions.

Anyways, I need to run to work. I'll try to finish off part 2 later this week. If not, it'll be next week.

Nic

Update: We will NOT move to www.webs.com

We have given webs.com a test run, but both Nic and I have decided that blogspot is better for our uses.

Vafa

Fantasy Storylines -- Shadow of the Legacy, Part 2

Week 6:

The show starts off with Rhodes and DiBiase fighting verbally, again, until Randy Orton enters the arena, but stays on the ramp.

Randy Orton: I see that both of you had had enough of each other. I guess that tag teams were meant to be broken up. Now, to help me out to decide who'll be kicked out of Legacy, I'll put both of you in single matches tonight.

Match 1 -- Cody Rhodes vs. Chavo Guerrero

Rhodes destroys Chavo Guerrero impressively. A screenshot of Orton, who looks somewhat impressed, looking at a monitor backstage is shown.

Match 2 -- Ted DiBiase vs. Chris Masters

After a very impressive technical match-up, DiBiase picks up the win. Another screenshot of Orton looking impressed backstage is shown.

Orton then makes his way to his car, but DiBiase stops him.

Ted DiBiase: Hey Orton, it'll definitely be me, right? I have way more charisma and wrestling ability than Rhodes. You know that.

Cody Rhodes, who seems like he came out from nowhere, interrupts DiBiase.

Cody Rhodes: What are you saying, DiBiase? Orton will surely pick me.

Randy Orton: Guys, I haven't made a decision yet. Look, next week, DiBiase will team up with me. And the week after that, Rhodes will team up with me. Now, if you'll excuse me...

Orton enters his car and drives it.

Week 7:

Match 1 -- Ted DiBiase and Randy Orton vs. Cryme Tyme

Orton is not even tagged in once, but his team manages to pick up the win after a very impressive performance by Ted. Orton looks very satisfied with the performance.

Week 8:

Match 2 -- Cody Rhodes and Randy Orton vs. Primo and Carlito

The Colon's reunition was not a sweet one as Orton's team picked up the win. After a while, Orton picks up a microphone.

Randy Orton: I have made my decision...after a match at Breaking Point. And what better to be a submission match, which will truly show who has the better wrestling ability. And to counter any interference, I will be the guest enforcer for the match.

Breaking Point:

Match 1 -- Cody Rhodes vs. Ted DiBiase

After a long match and no interference, DiBiase makes Rhodes tap. After the match, Orton congratulates DiBiase. However, Rhodes gets a chair and enters the ring. He attempts to deliver a shot to Orton, however, Orton quickly ducks and delivers a very lethal RKO to Rhodes. Orton does that \____o___/ pose. DiBiase picks up the chair and looks like he's about to deliver a shot to Rhodes. Shockingly, DiBiase delivers a shot to Orton. DiBiase helps Rhodes to get back on his feet and the Legacy music hits. DiBiase and Rhodes celebrate and leave the ring as they leave a lifeless Orton in the ring.

Week 9:

Rhodes and DiBiase are in the ring with smiles on their faces.

Cody Rhodes: I am happy to say that DiBiase has been traded back to Raw, and therefore, Priceless is now an official stable. And since we have stopped being Orton's tools, we're shooting for some gold.

Orton enters the ring but looks injured.

Randy Orton: I swear if I wasn't injured, I would have RKOed both of you into space. Since I can't kick your asses, these guys can.

Jerishow enters the ring, but Priceless quickly leave it. Rhodes gets a microphone.

Cody Rhodes: I'm not going to engage in some kind of crazy brawl. Noooo. Instead, why don't we have a title match?

Chris Jericho: You haven't even deserved a title shot. Wha...

The guest host(Whoever he/she is lol) appears on the TitanTron.

Guest host: How about a contendership match for Priceless next week, and if they win, they'll face Jerishow at Hell in a Cell?

Ted DiBiase: Jerishow, consider those titles ours. And that's a promise.

Okay, I'll be stopping now. Tune in for the next parts. Another thing, for the rumors of Nic trying to move the blog into Webs.com is half true. We're just going for a trial run to see what Webs.com can provide. Me and Nic will keep you updated as more on the story comes. Oh and I just like to point this out, I'm discontinuing this storyline mainly because a similar storyline was on SvR '10's Orton's RTWM mode.

Until then,

Vafa